In decades past, to have a big family was not uncommon, nor was caring for your big family questioned by society. Enter Nayda Suleman, the mother from Whitter Ca who had 6 children and had octuplets in January 2009. Now "the octu-spectacle wont go away", there are daily stories about this mother and her ability to care for all 14 children, the newborns are still in the hospital, which concerns as to if the babies will be released in her care. Sit and ask why does society care about this mom, here is one answer from Harvey Levin of TMZ as quoted in LA Tines, "Octomom is crazy. People like crazy. Crazy in more interesting than boring. It's that simple." There are so many out there that have opinions about this mother being on public assistance, her home in pre-foreclosure, the doctor preforming invitro and the 911 tapes released to prove the fact that she is unfit to raise her children. "When Kaiser Permanente hospital officials questioned her ability to take care of the octuplets, he was the doctor she called in distress.", referring to Dr. Phil with whom she did an interview with that took over two days of air time. With so many people against a woman having large family and questioning her ability to care for them, it should stop and make us think, how did families decades ago care for their large family? Forty years ago spousal and child abuse/neglect were not openly spoken of, and if their were laws they were not enforced. Especially in smaller communities where most would just mind their own business and not get involved. The authors of this LA Times article may have a lot of views and quotes about how the single mother of a large family, but in the end, only a mother can love 14 children and what is in her heart is not open to the public, after reading this article, octu mom has the right to have a large family, unless she breaks a law, and at this point she has not. As she said to Dr. Phil, "I am no one special."
http://www.latimes.com/news/science/la-et-octuplets28-2009feb28,0,4834818.story?track=rss
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Hey Virginia, good job on the blog. You make a good point that it is her business, and everyone is obsessing over it a bit too much. But my prayers are with those children. Fortunately, there are generous people and programs that can help support them. It takes more than love to raise a healthy (in every sense of the word) child.
ReplyDeleteBtw, I don't want you to think that I was implying that you do not know what it takes! I have all the respect in the world for mothers, especially those with numerous children who are able to do the things that I don't know that I could do. I just think that their should be a level of restraint in such circumstances.
ReplyDeleteOOH. Octomom. I have so many things to say about this one, but I think it best to keep most of them to myself. ;) That said, at some level, she absolutely has the right to do what she will with her body, and if this includes having 14 children she can't afford or care for (without much outside help, and help she can't afford), then so be it. It's dangerous ground to pose the idea that we can/should legislate women's reproduction. That said . . . what if no one came to her rescue? What if no one stepped in and offered to contribute the things (time, money, clothing, etc.) that she, effectively, should be contributing? Does she have the right to produce children by whom she is incapable of doing the "right" thing? Can she provide basic care for all 14? On her own?
ReplyDeleteThis is an interesting spectacle, and I'm sure it will continue to be so. Interesting post.